6 1/2 months to the wedding and I haven't tried on a single dress

You're probably reading the subject line and thinking "No way! I had my dress picked out a year before the wedding." or something along those lines. And even if you didn't have your dress picked out by now, you had gone into bridal shops and tried stuff on. "How does she live?" You must be asking yourself, "Isn't the thought of not having a dress just killing her?"

The "New Orleans" $995.00

But really, I do have a dress...well...sort of. I have a pile of silk and polyester for lining, a zipper and some buttons at my parents' house.  It all started b/c I was a fatass and incredibly lazy (not to mention too excited to wait) and internet browsing/shopping is way easier. You don't have to worry about hours or locations or driving time or bad weather. I ♥ the Internet.

The first few weeks of being engaged I did what any sane bride would do...I googled "vintage wedding dresses" and came up with this gem from Dolly Couture (It's under a cut so that Math doesn't accidentally see it) almost right away.  But wow...$995.00! So I wrote that one off and looked for cheaper dresses in the $100-300 range because (if you've read my last post) I was not willing to become one of the bride casualties to the expensive wedding dress industry.

Unfortunately, I could not get the other dress out of my head nor could I find cheaper versions that quite had the same elegant simplicity of the "first" dress. In the end I convinced my mom that she could make the dress since it was so simple with no beading or crazy folds. And now I'm patiently waiting for her to finish it and yes, it is kind of killing me. I tried on the prototype which I guess kind of counts but mom says that is not at all what the finished dress would look or feel like. So I wait.....impatiently...while all my other current bride friends are going to try on dresses at tiny boutiques and David's Bridal alike.

Yes, I am a little jealous that I won't have gotten a "real" wedding dress fitting experience where all my bridesmaids hover around me and tell me how good or bad I look in a certain dress. I will never have the experience of trying on a dress 4 sizes too big and awkwardly holding it closed while I try to imagine how it would hang on my particular frame. But, you know, that's OK. It's just more time I'd have to spend coordinating with the BrMs and shopping and re-shopping etc.

And the benefit of making a dress is that it is SOOO much cheaper than even a David's Bridal Special, though some online sites could rival the price. And another benefit is that it will be so unique and me. No one else will have the same dress ever (unlike if I bought it from Dolly Couture where you can see how many people had bought the dress before you).  I am confident that I made the right choice.

Even though it does feel weird to not have tried on a single wedding dress.

And this post would not be complete without pictures so here are a couple other dresses from Dolly Couture that I like (though not quite as much).

The "Summerville": $565.00

Budget much? How the wedding industry has brides by the proverbial balls.

$205.99

Wedding planning would be a lot more fun if I had an unlimited amount of money (or I guess, in this case, if my parents had an unlimited amount of money). Yeah, I'm not ashamed to admit it, my parents are paying for most of the wedding stuff. I mean, it's great since if it were up to Math and me, we would have to wait a couple years to save up the money. Math has been working to pay off his (now "our" hehe) 2nd mortgage and I bought a car about two weeks before he proposed. (Bad timing on his part? LOL).

 A friend's wedding on the awesome balcony of the Colorado History Museum
(now the renamed and totally rebuilt, "History Colorado Center").

People have been asking me if I am going to put our budget on my blog. Some people think that I shouldn't but others (usually other brides-to-be) have been asking.  I figure that I might as well, I mean, I know money can be a point of comparison and contention between people but I personally think that everyone should be more open about it in general. For instance, I have a friend who did her wedding for around $10,000 and I have to say that she is one of the people I admire the most for this. Her ceremony was lovely, her reception a TON of fun, food tasty, dress beautiful etc. etc. And she did it without paying too much.

Hehe...Love this pic. 

I would like to be her. Unfortunately, I'm not.  While I'm cost-cutting at every turn there are a few major differences between her wedding and mine that increased my budget to...um...$15,000.

First of all, my guest list is much bigger and I just can't cut people. There have been a lot of people in the various stages of my life that have helped shape me into the person that I am today and I would like to have them share in this special joy. And feeding those people is going to cost money, unfortunately, you can't skimp too much on the caterer.  Unless you got Qdoba, and as tasty as that is...it's not really wedding food.

The Rockin' dance floor!

Second, I made the mistake of picking bridesmaid gifts that are more expensive (think $10-20 difference per each) and more rare per unit than I'd thought. Probably because they're vintage items....But I can't change it now since I've already bought some of them. Unfortunately, that's all the info I can give since I don't want my BrMs to know what it is. And I actually think all of them read this. Well...maybe.

Third, I'm just not quite as savvy as my $10,000 friend and DEFINITELY not as creative/crafty/DIY-y. I really should've just hired her as a wedding planner because she has given me so many great ideas that take me way longer to implement than she did because it involves me learning how to actually be artsy/talented.

One of the big budget decisions I've been waffling back and forth on is getting a florist or not since that will cost more money but also that person will have more knowledge of bouquets and bouttoniers etc. Though $10,000 friend made her own everything and as I was the one who caught the bouquet, I can tell you that that thing was SOLID like a ROCK! It took me around 10 minutes to unbind it all. =)

But, I mean, there are a lot of things I have done to keep the price down from making my own Save the Dates to hiring my mom (for the price of grattitude and kisses) to make my dress. Which brings me to the title of this post...I was reading this article on Boulder weddings and found this gem of a quote from the owner of Boulder Bridal (the same bridal shop that pretty much told my mom that my idea for a dress was completely undoable in every aspect):

"(some) Brides' dress budgets have dropped so low that (I ) often don't have a dress to fit their needs. And yet, it doesn't take much to convince them to spend more on a dress. Once the bride puts into perspective a $2,000 dress when the rest of their wedding costs 10 times that amount, they're willing to give a 'little more' to look and feel good (scare quotes added by me)."

TWO-THOUSAND-DOLLARS for a dress you will wear ONCE for about 4-5 hours. (I've been thinking about buying a Coach purse for ~$300 and am having a hard time justfying that. It is at least something that I will be able to use forever [lifetime warranty] in 85-90% of situations.  I'm sorry, but I really don't think my wedding dress should cost more than a Coach purse.)

The wedding industry has a tight grip on starry-eyed brides-to-be.  This is the shit they are selling...that: 

"OMG! $2000 is a GREAT deal for a dress!"

And:

"But don't you want to look beautiful on your wedding day?"

A $2,000 dress is, 8-15% of the "average" wedding budget (and also 2/3 the price of my first car that lasted for 9 years). That's the price for being beautiful?

Of course I do, but in the words of my fiance, my parents and countless friends and coworkers, I have looked "beautiful" in $20-$80 dresses. So, maybe I could add a little room for more fabric and a specialized style. How about $300? Now that's a GREAT deal for a dress. Here are some examples of ~$300 or less dresses (and yes, they're probably from China, but I'm sure so are David's Bridal's and countless others. And if not the whole dress, then I'm sure at least some piece of it.) All of these are from Milanoo.com. 

$183.99

$175.99

Whew...this bride doesn't mess around!

Since I last updated I have booked two major things:

1). Caterer:
YES!!  We've unofficially booked the caterer and they have been generous enough to let us pay the deposit after the holidays!  I still need to fill out the official contract as well but we have till Jan 16th or so to do that.  Woohoo!  They are called Footers Catering  and are located in Denver, CO.  Unfortunately, the price is better than most I've seen but still when you factor in the # of guests that I'm expecting, it's still a lot of money.  But food-wise it comes to ~$23.00pp.  When you add in rentals of tables, chairs, plates, silverware and all that shit, it's more like around $52.00pp.  Which, is really REALLY not bad.

Plus, the food was really great!  We're going to have apps, like mushroom quesedillas w/ pesto and 2 stations: Pad Thai and Crepes.  I don't want to give too much detail because you'll have to come to find out what all the yummy choices are, but I will say that it is about 75% vegetarian.  Only 1 app, 1 soup and then mix-ins for the stations will have meat in them.  (For the stations, you can elect to just not have meat but can still eat the whole rest of the stuff in it). =)

2). Photographer:
We've found a great local photographer courtesy of on of my high school friends.  He's a young photographer just starting out, but with some wedding experience already.  He's got a great eye for light and effects and is a great price!  He is also letting us put down the deposit in January, which save us for the holidays. ^_^

His name is Chase Hoffman, and he's charging us $800 for the whole wedding from before to after and for ALL our good pics on a DVD.  Amazing rates.  I'd highly suggest you check him out, though he did say that he was planning to raise his prices a bit.  But still a great deal, I'm guessing.  And also a great person to work with. :)

3). Videographer: I have enlisted a friend of mine to do the videography-ing.  The "cheapest" videographers I've found  were $700-$900 and, I'm sorry, but that's just way too much to hold a camera and ask people to give their best wishes to the bride and groom. And since we have all the equipment and Math is great at making videos, we decided that all we really needed was someone to hold the camera.  And yes, we ARE paying him like $200. Plus, I think he will do a very great job.  He's an architect (methodical) and also very people-persony. Whew...cross that off the checklist!

4). Hotel: My mom booked a block of rooms at the Westin Downtown. Rooms are normally like $200/night but she got a deal of like $130 or something like that.  I made a VERY extensive list of details and things to do on our wedding website. So please go check it out, don't let my efforts and roughly 2 1/2 hours of my life go to waste!!  I still need to research cheaper downtown hotels for those who can't/won't afford the Westin. Though I hear that it's a very nice hotel! We'd love for all our friends to stay downtown and join us for brunch the next morning. There's nothing like the party that keeps on giving. ;-)

I still have to find a DJ. Ours was supposed to be an employee from The Artwork Network, but he is no longer working there and the owner didn't give me his contact info so I'm guessing he left on not-so-great terms.  So, that leaves us w/o a DJ so the same applies as above. We will pay you ~$200 to monitor our iPod playlist, make sure stuff cues on time and make important announcements.

I'm also still looking for a florist/deciding if I WANT a florist. I have a couple contacts, but they wanted to wait until after the holidays, which is totally understandable.

We're getting close to having all the big stuff done. Yay!  After that, the fun stuff will start.

Save the Date Video!!!